Chinese sex toys confiscated in Vietnam
Authorities in Vietnam's southern commercial hub of Ho Chi Minh City seized one ton of Chinese-made sex toys, aphrodisiacs and other sexual stimulants, state-controlled media reported Friday.
Police and market inspectors Thursday confiscated the illegal shipment, which included more than 10,000 tablets of Viagra, sex toys and sexual stimulants in the form of tablets, powder and liquid hidden in a truckload of onions, the Laborer newspaper said.
The newspaper quoted a truck driver Mai Ngoc Hoang as saying he was hired to transport the goods from the northern province of Lang Son bordering China to Ho Chi Minh City. Hoang was detained for questioning and police are investigating the case, the report said.
Sex toys for good Christians
There are no butt plugs. There are no curvy Pyrex toys and no leather strap-ons and certainly no Jackhammer Jesus dildos, and you'll be hard-pressed to find even a decent vibrator or dildo here (and if you do, you'll certainly not see them described with those terms), and the site's design is hovering somewhere around 2001, all blocky graphics and clunky interfaces and sweet, classic, God-fearing HTML.
But it doesn't really matter. Because it's an online sex toy store. For Christians. Or, more specifically, for Christian marrieds (because, presumably, no matter how good a Christian you are and no matter how fervently you pray to be rid of all those fantasies involving pony play and latex, if you're single, you still shouldn't be using these toys. Hey, they're not called "Marital aids" for nothing, heathen).
The store's called Book22 (book22.com - referring, for all you pagans out there, to the Bible's one racy, hot n' heavy chapter, the Song of Solomon). They gently, sweetly carry lubes and ticklers and tiny bullet vibes, rings and condoms and massage oils, creams and games and edible body paints. They also carry, God bless 'em, the Hitachi Magic Wand, God's one true gift to women.
And, well, that's about it. It is, in its meek way, sort of disturbing wonderful. What's more, when you order, Book22's team of virgin angels will thoughtfully remove any naughty packaging from your products. Or if they can't remove it, they will place stickers over the offending photos of naked moaning people. This will help you remain morally clean as you cry out to God.
But hey. It's a Christian sex toy shop. It is either the 347th sign of the apocalypse, or a sign that maybe, just maybe, we're all one big happy perverted family after all. Or maybe it's both.
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